


Way Down We Go

by ArbitraryRambunctious (SheepOutTetradecagon), flightlesscrow



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Angst, M/M, but also fluff, character injury, will add more tags later
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-23
Updated: 2017-02-05
Packaged: 2018-09-01 14:00:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 13,915
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8627248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SheepOutTetradecagon/pseuds/ArbitraryRambunctious, https://archiveofourown.org/users/flightlesscrow/pseuds/flightlesscrow
Summary: DISCONTINUEDThey both know it is a risky game they play, but neither would give up the sport for anything. For Leo and Guang-Hong, figure skating is a passion but also the thing that brought them and their friend circle together. It is challenging, beautiful and not to mention exciting. However, when things start to spiral out of control for Leo, he doesn't know if he will ever recover. Despite living in a different part of the world, Guang-Hong refuses to let his friend give up. It might be a slow process, but he vows to help his friend back on his feet again, no matter what it takes.





	1. Prologue- Petite Ouverture à danser

It is an almost intoxicating feeling to be on the ice. When he steps out on it, it is like the world disappears and he becomes an entirely different person. Many people like to tell stories through words or drawings or movies; he tells them through skating. He tells them through the smooth movements on honed blades sliding across frozen water. He is only one in many storyteller, but he is there to win.

He isn’t sure about what it was that made him want to start skating, but he knows he owes a lot to skating. It has become such a huge part of his life. Funny that, how a little sport has become such a huge part of his life. That so many of his friends are people he met through it. He feels indebted. After all, his own story is far from interesting without it. It is made up by all the people he has met through it and the countless supporters who have cheered him on. And it is made up of him. Strange how he cannot imagine not having him in his life anymore. If there is anything that makes Guang-Hong Ji indebted to his skating apart from it giving him a purpose, it is for it to lead him to Leo de Ia Iglesia.

* * *

He is in America the first time he sees him. His trainer arranged a trip there while he was in Canada over the summer to train. It is his last year as a junior skater, so he will have to put in some effort before his senior debut. It is quite different, America, nothing like the huge cities back home. Sure, there is a certain grandeur to it all, with big buildings and new technology everywhere, but it is slightly less crowded.

It doesn’t stop him from being amazed by everything he sees. The air is fresher, like in Canada, and the heat slightly more bearable. The English rolling of people’s tongues is steady and flows differently from his native language. He tries his best to pick out what random passing people says as he and his coach walk past them on their way into the city from the bus stop.

The trip was merely meant as a sightseeing trip, taking the opportunity to visit America before his summer training camp. However, he can’t help it when he sees a sign proudly proclaiming that there is a rink nearby. His trainer huffs and asks him if he doesn’t want to take a break from skating for one day at least, but he feels like he has seen enough and also he happens to be very curious about the American skaters.

The public rink isn’t anywhere near as big in size as some of the rinks he has been on, but it has a charm to it. Most of the people are obviously just there for fun, laughing and talking excitedly with each other as they try not to fall. Guang-Hong smiles to himself as he sees a boy try to coax a young child onto the ice, holding onto the kid’s hands in order to keep him steady. It is a heart-warming sight.

He watches them as he ties his skates to his feet. Figure skates, unlike the bulkier hockey skates that many of the other men opt for. He can feel excitement bubbly up in his little body as he enters the rink, skating a few meters just to get into it. Soon enough he is performing simple jumps and spins, enjoying the feeling of ice underneath his feet. He can sense that some of the skaters are watching him in awe, while others continue doing their own thing, obviously not a stranger to figure skaters.

There are a few others practicing figure skating like him, but no one appears to be on competing level. He doesn’t really mind, it is fun to watch their moves. He stops after a while, not all too comfortable with all the attention on him. The brown-haired boy from earlier has stopped helping the little kid too and is watching him with interest. He blushes slightly, and skates over to his trainer who has entered the rink as well and is gliding across it with long fluid movements.

“Do you want to go back already?” she asks. Guang-Hong shakes his head, glancing back at where the brown-haired boy was standing earlier. He is following the little kid he was helping over to a group of kids. They cling to him as he enters their little circle, smiling the whole time. Glad but also a bit disappointed that he lost his attention, Guang-Hong turns back to his trainer.

“I’m going to practice for a bit. Do you think we can go out for food afterwards?”

His trainer frowns in a reprimanding way at him, placing her hands on her hips.

“We didn’t go here so you could spend all your time on training,” she huffs, but there is an amused undertone to it. She ruffles his hair lovingly, making Guang-Hong giggle.

“We’ll go out for some food afterwards. Maybe we can find a hot pot place. There sure is a lot of trashy food chains here.”

“But I don’t like hot pot,” Guang-Hong complains, knowing she suggested that only because she knew he would protest. She smiles cunningly at him, shooing him off to train again.

Back on the ice the group of kids have gone off on their own, and the older boy is skating alone. Guang-Hong doesn’t really pay him much attention at first. He is focused on his own skating, trying to land that quad he has been struggling with lately. He knows he should save his training for the camp, getting injured now would be dumb and the chance is definitely higher with all the inexperienced skaters crowding the space around him. He tries to land his quads anyway, feeling a little disappointed when he just keeps falling or touching down with his hands. Guang-Hong is not sure how long he tries, but after one fall too many, he decides it’s time to find his coach again. He takes a look around, surveying the people on the ice when he sees him.

He is clearly not an amateur, his movements calm and controlled, landing his jumps with ease. Guang-Hong freezes and watches in awe. It’s the brown-haired boy from before, now free of the group of kids. He suddenly seems familiar, as if Guang-Hong has seen him somewhere before. However, he doesn’t get the chance to find out where, as someone suddenly barrels into him from the side, sending him sprawling onto the ice. The people on the rink stops, and Guang-Hong can hear someone screaming.

When he sits up his coach is all over him, checking for injuries. A blonde man is apologizing to him, seemingly afraid of having hurt him. Guang-Hong tries to tell them that he feels fine, but his coach continues to fret, demanding for someone to bring a medic. The brown-haired boy is standing at the edge of the crowd gathered around him, his eyes slightly worried. It clicks, the pieces falling into place. He can’t remember his name, but Guang-Hong knows he is one of the skaters in senior division. He knows he has seen him on tv at some point, his routine just as eye-catching back then as the simple moves he just performed.

Guang-Hong thinks about him when his coach takes him out for a proper American meal. He is still in his head when they go the cinema to watch one of those Hollywood movies he loves. He haunts the inside of his eyes when he tries to catch sleep that night. Guang-Hong resolves to become good enough to compete on his level someday.

* * *

Phichit is the one who shows him Instagram, and quite honestly, he kinda gets a little addicted after that. Not only is it a good way to keep up with all the fans, but it also gives him the opportunity to see what the other skaters are up to. He knows he still has a long way to become half as good as the best of them, but for now he can gather some inspiration from their social media posts.

His coach chides him about spending so much time on his phone, but he is currently just waiting for his turn on the ice, skate America only a few days away. He is about to post a selfie onto his account when he is suddenly there. Guang-Hong hasn’t given him much thought lately, too caught up in preparing for his senior debut. There he is though, a soft smile on his face as he sits himself next to Guang-Hong. Another skater follows, slumping down beside the guy. The guy who is currently stretching out his hand to greet him. He takes it clumsily, feeling his face redden. Curse his skin for reddening easily.

“You’re that Chinese skater, right? Phichit told me about you.” Guang-Hong nods shyly, suddenly at loss for words. He appears to be a friend of Phichit though. It makes Guang-Hong feel at least a little bit more comfortable. The two have known each other for some time now, having met several times at events back in Asia.

“Guang-Hong Ji, nice to meet you,” he mumbles.

“Leo de la Iglesia,” he replies, and Guang-Hong immediately internally panics. He is fluent enough in English to communicate fairly well, but he doesn’t trust himself with it entirely. Of course the guy had to have a complicated name. He seems to sense Guang-Hong’s panic, as he smiles warmly, giving him a friendly pat on the back.

“You can call me Leo though. Is this your first time in America?”

Guang-Hong hates to admit it, but he feels his heart sink a little. Of course, it has been a while since he last visited the States, but he thought Leo would at least remember him for ungracefully being knocked over, if not for his skating. He hasn’t changed much since then, maybe grown a little bit taller. Then again, he cannot blame him for not remembering every skater he’s seen on the rink.

“I’ve been here once before, though I go to Canada to train in the summer.” Leo sighs almost in relief.

“So that was you back then? I thought I recognised you.” He smiles again, and Guang-Hong immediately feels calmer. There is something about Leo that makes him feel safe, as if the boy is radiating warmth and kindness. They easily fall into a comfortable conversation after that. Leo tells him about his routines and about how he choreographs most of them himself, much to Guang-Hong’s surprise. It is with a bit of reluctance that Guang-Hong tells him about his dream of reaching Hollywood someday, knowing it is a bit farfetched, but Leo just smiles at him, encouraging his dream. It feels nice to have someone believing in him. They are exchanging social media usernames when the skater currently on the rink, the one from Kazakhstan, finally finishes his routine, eyeing them almost grumpily as they are bent over their phones, watching him step off the ice with curious eyes.  

He nods stiffly to them as he walks past them, not particularly interested in joining their conversation. Leo rises to his feet, his skates slung over his shoulder.

“I should get ready, but if you have time we could go out for food together afterwards?”

Guang-Hong smiles excitedly, nodding. He follows Leo with his eyes as he takes the rink. He settles himself deeper into his seat, pulling his knees up under him. His hands are resting in front of his mouth as he watches the routine intently. He can feel his heart jump every time Leo lands a jump, almost as if he is waiting for him to fail, which he is not. He is just scared he will, even if it is just practice. Then he realises just how good Leo’s routine is, and it all comes crashing back to him.

Leo is an opponent just like everyone else. He will have to skate against him in skate America and maybe even beat him to qualify. The butterflies in his stomach seems to get even more wild, and he hunches over, watching as Leo perfectly lands another jump. His coach chooses that moment to come up to him, her eyes trained on Leo as well.

“Are you nervous?” she asks, which is dumb because of course he is nervous. It is his senior debut and the other skaters are amazing. Instead of telling her that, he simply shakes his head and gets his skates, ready for his turn on the ice after Leo.

They meet each other’s eyes as they walk past each other, the friendly promise of a meal afterwards lingering. Guang-Hong holds onto that as he skates, reasoning with himself that even if he doesn’t win he has gained a new friend which is awesome in and of itself. Of course that doesn’t mean he isn’t going in intending to win, but he is still young. He has time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone!  
> So I'm co-writing this with my awesome friend who also thought there should be more Leoji out there, so here we go. Since neither of us are professional skaters, please tell us if something is wrong, then we will do our best to fix it. Also, if you have anything you want to say leave a comment or come find us on tumblr. 
> 
> We're Sheepouttetradecagon and Zerogravitychuuya (:
> 
> Title from "Way down we go"- by Kaleo and chapter title "Petite Ouverture à danser" by Erik Satie


	2. Chapter 2

It was the day of the short program in the Skate America competition, and Leo was a little nervous for it. There were a lot of good skaters there. He wanted to advance to the next round, and hopefully make it to the Grand Prix Final. But first, he had to place here. He breathed in deep and exhaled slowly. He couldn’t let this distract him. He was going to place; he was determined to. His pride wouldn’t let him fail. 

He found his coach and stood with her as they watched the other skaters and their coaches get ready for the competition. It was soon time to go out for the warm up skate.    
  
“Ya ready?” His coach asked, placing a hand on his shoulder. He nodded. A few strands of hair came loose from his ponytail, but he didn’t care enough to fix it. 

“The skaters may now enter the rink for the six-minute warm up skate.” Said the announcer over the PA system. Leo looked back at his coach. She gave him a pat on the back and lightly pushed him towards the ice.    
  
His mind was blank as he entered the ice to warm up. He could feel the eyes of other skaters on him, as well as the audience, but he pushed that knowledge to the back of his mind and focused on this one task in front of him. 

He looked around as well, though, and caught glimpse of the Chinese skater he talked to a few days ago. Did his name start with a G? Leo couldn’t remember, but the first part was split into two names. His outfit was nice, a pretty red, sparkly fabric accompanied by black. Leo thought it fitting for the skater.    
  
After the short six minutes was up, the skaters exited the ice. Leo did not know the name of all the skaters. But he knew that he was skating fifth, and the Chinese skater was to skate before he was. 

Two programs had passed, Leo watching without much interest. The skaters were good, for sure, and got good responses from the audience. But he could not be fully engaged by their performances for some reason. Nonetheless, he rooted for them as he hoped they’d do for him.    
  
The next performer was the Chinese boy. His name, as Leo heard from the announcer, was Guang-Hong Ji, and this was his senior debut. Leo watched, this time with interest, as Guang-Hong began his program. Leo couldn’t take his eyes off of the skater, his performance enthralling, beautiful, and captivating. Leo was entranced. 

He could almost see the music rather than hear it just by watching Guang-Hong skate. He had beautiful form.    
  
All too soon, the program ended, but still Leo could not take his eyes away from Guang-Hong. The audience roared their approval, and Guang-Hong left the ice with a bright smile on his face. 

Leo did not pay attention to the fourth skater, getting ready himself for his program. His coach gave him a pep talk before he went on the ice after the fourth skater had finished. He thanked her with a hug before stepping onto the ice.

The crowd was quiet as the announcer presented information about Leo and his program to them. The song began, and he smiled, knowing that he could wow them all even without complicated jumps. And that’s exactly what he did.    
  
By the time he was finished with his routine, the audience was cheering so loud he thought his eardrums would burst. He had also gotten a great score for it, so he was quite pleased when he and his coach walked back to watch the last performance.    
  
After everyone had performed and the standings were announced, Leo discovered he was in first place. Guang-Hong was in third, and it looked like there’d be a great chance they’d qualify to advance tomorrow. Leo wanted to celebrate.   
  
“Hey, is it okay if I go out to eat with a friend?” Leo asked his coach.   
  
“Sure, just don’t stay out too late.”   
  
“Alright!” With his coach’s approval, he went off in search of Guang-Hong. He found him talking with his coach. Patiently, he waited until they were finished talking to approach.

“Hey, Guang-Hong?” He said in a questioning tone.   
  
“Oh, Leo! What’s up?” Guang-Hong asked, turning to face Leo.

“I was wondering if you wanted to grab a bite to eat? If that’s alright,” Leo said, glancing at Guang-Hong’s coach. 

Guang-Hong looked at her too, silently asking permission. 

“Oh, fine,” She sighed, giving in. “Don’t stay out too late and don’t get into trouble.”    
  
“Got it, thanks!” Guang-Hong said. The two then left the rink and walked around the city for a bit. “Did you have a place in mind?” Guang-Hong asked after a while. 

“Hmm, no, not really. I was just gonna stop at the first place that looked good.” Leo replied. Guang-Hong nodded.    
  
Suddenly, Leo pulled him into a restaurant. It was considerably warmer inside than outside, so Guang-Hong was grateful.

“This is one of my favorite restaurants.” Leo said, finding a table for them. 

“It looks like an ordinary diner,” Guang-Hong mumbled in a confused tone.    
  
“Yeah, but their food can’t be beat. Just wait, you’ll see.” 

“If you say so.”

A comfortable silence settled between them as they looked over the menu. A waiter came up to them then, asking if he could get them something to drink.    
  
“Just water for me, please.” Leo said.   
  
“Water for me too,” Guang-Hong said when the waiter looked at him. 

“Okay, and are you ready to order?”    
  
“Yeah, I think so. I’m going to have the western omelette, please.” Leo and the waiter then looked at Guang-Hong, waiting for him to make a decision.

“Oh, I’ll um… I’ll have that, too.” Guang-Hong hadn’t actually looked at the menu to make a decision, so he just went with whatever Leo got.    
  
“Dude, the western omelette is so good, you’re gonna love it,” Leo said excitedly when the waiter left. 

They made small talk as they waited on their food to get there, and throughout their meal as well. They learned quite a bit about each other and discovered that they had a lot in common. By the end of the night, they were quite close, bonding over skating amongst other things. One thing being that they had a mutual friend, Phichit Chulanont. 

All in all, it was a great night. They were staying in the same hotel for the competition, so they walked back together. It was around 9 when they got back, yet Leo still got scolded for being out late. He swore that they weren’t gone that long, but he had admittedly lost track of the time during his and Guang-Hong’s outing. 

Leo was glad that he could get to know Guang-Hong more, and hoped that they could continue to be friends. He went to sleep thinking about his new friend, a small smile on his lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, I'm the other writer for this fic. I'll be writing Leo's parts.  
> Sorry this is so short, I was running out of ideas.
> 
> Please let us know how you're enjoying the fic so far! You can leave us a comment or come say hi to us on tumblr! We're sheepouttetradecagon and zerogravitychuuya.


	3. Of flowers and infernos

It feels good to be back home again, the familiar buzz of the cities all around him. Guang-Hong smiles fondly as he takes in the sight of the busy airport around him. His coach is cursing under her breath as she tries to locate their luggage, still not at the baggage claim.

Some of the other skaters that came with the same plane are looking around in confusion as they step foot into the huge airport. Guang-Hong spots Leo together with his coach, trying not to be swept away with the masses of people. They gather together around the empty conveyor belts, waiting impatiently for the contraption to start.

Leo tries to say something to Guang-Hong, but he cannot really hear him over the noise of the people around them. He tries to convey this by shaking his head at the taller boy, mouthing to him that it is too loud. Leo squints in confusion for a moment, but then he leans in, placing his mouth next to Guang-Hong’s ear. He can’t help the surge of butterflies in his stomach.

“Phichit sent me a snap. He’s already here, and asked if we wanted to meet up later today.”

Guang-Hong lights up at the words. It’s been a long time since he has seen Phichit, and he wouldn’t say no to spending some time with Leo either. He nods, but realises that Leo won’t be able to see that when they are standing so close. Hurriedly he takes a step back and mouths a yes to him, the airport still too loud to even bother trying to be heard. His coach pokes him in the shoulder as the conveyor belt comes to life with a slight whirr, suitcases and bags in a rainbow of different colours starting to appear out of a hole in the wall.

They find theirs soon enough, but Guang-Hong’s coach still seems stressed for some reason. He waves a quick goodbye to Leo and his coach as he is dragged out of the airport and into a taxi which takes them to the hotel they will be staying at. He briefly wonders if he will have the time to visit home before the competition. It is still a few days until the cup of China and it would be only a day’s trip with a bus to get home. He glances over at his coach, doubting she’d let him take a day off before a big competition. Also, he really wants to catch up with Phichit and the others. Rumours have it that Viktor will be at the cup as well, and Guang-Hong has to admit he feels excited about a chance to meet the great skater.

His coach is really tired when they finally settle into their little room. It is a plain room with two beds and a view of the bustling street below. For a moment Guang-Hong let’s himself just sit by the windowsill and watch the people, but it becomes boring quickly. He tries to listen to some music to relieve his boredom since he still has a few hours before he’s going to meet up with Phichit and Leo.

* * *

He is woken by his coach shaking his shoulder, trying to pry him out of bed. Despite being a person who doesn’t sleep much in general, he is a nightmare to wake when he has first fallen into a good sleep. Guang-Hong bats at his coach’s hand, trying to get her to leave him alone. Not having any of his shit, she sighs and pulls the blanket away from him.

The sudden cold is enough to wake him and he sits up with a complaining whine. It is kind of inevitable when you spend so much time with a person. The two of them have grown rather close after all their years together, and even though she can be really strict, Guang-Hong loves her dearly. Not right now though. He feels like he should be allowed to be a bit sulky. He travelled for hours yesterday, after all.

“Your father called,” she announces impatiently. “He said he was in the area for work, so if you want to you two can meet up after practice today.”

All sour thoughts are forgotten as the words leave his coach’s mouth. He leaps out of bed and find his clothes. It is chilly this part of year, so he makes sure to dress properly.

“When are we going to the rink?” he asks as he seats himself by the table. His coach has already been down in the hotel restaurant and retrieved some breakfast for them. Guang-Hong breathes in the delicious scent of warm buns and fresh juice, happily digging in.

“You have about half-an hour to get ready,” she replies and helps herself to a bun. Her dark hair is illuminated by the sun filtering through their curtains, turning it a warm shade of brown. When her face isn’t pulled into her usual strict worried grimace, she actually looks pretty.

They head down to the rink soon afterwards. Even though it is early, there are several skaters already gliding across the ice. Guang-Hong rubs his eyes and tries to look more awake than he feels.

The training goes better than he expects, but he has to admit his mind isn’t really there. The program is exciting in itself, but he feels like there’s something missing still. Maybe he should sit down and watch Shanghai blade again after his meet up with his father. He tries his best anyway, making an effort to block out the other skaters. They are all really good and he’s not sure the nervous part of his brain will handle him looking too closely at their achievements.

When he is finally done, he can’t wait to get off the ice and into a warm cafe somewhere with his dad. It’s been well over 5 months since they last saw each other, and saying that he has been missing him and the rest of the family would be a real understatement. He rushes off to the wardrobes, barely giving his coach the time to tell him to be back by sundown.

In his excitement, he doesn’t notice the movements of a person approaching around the corner and runs straight into the person rounding it. He is met with the cold glare of the Russian representative. Guang-Hong cowers away from the Russian, mumbling a ‘sorry’ to him. The older male’s eyes are red-rimmed and he is clutching his phone hard enough that Guang-Hong is surprised it hasn’t broken yet. Out of all the skaters, he is definitely the most frightening. With his dramatic costume and height advantage, he could easily have taken Guang-Hong out if he wanted to. The other sniffles defiantly, and strides past Guang-Hong, making the younger boy feel a bit guilty for judging him by appearance. He tries his hardest not to stare as the skater stalks away with long steps, barely holding back tears.

Guang-Hong wonders briefly if he should ask the other if he is okay, but isn’t sure if he would have the guts to. He is just about to turn around to do it when a hand lands on his shoulder. He jumps, spinning around to fend off an eventual attacker as if he is one of the heroes in the movies he likes so much. He sighs in relief as the kind face of Leo meets him.

“I thought I’d find you here,” he says. He holds up his phone, it’s case bright pink, just like Guang-Hong’s. “Did you get my message?”

Guang-Hong shakes his head. He finds his phone, hurriedly shoved into his back pocket as he left to find his father. It shows three new messages, two of them from Leo and one from his father. He leaves the one from his father unattended for now and clicks on Leo’s contact name.

_ From Leo received 13:45 _

_ Hey Guang-Hong. We are heading out to eat. Did you want to come with? :) _

_ From Leo received 14:15 _

_ Where are you at? Are you okay? Phichit already left with someone, but we can still head out if you want to. Call me as soon as you get this. _

Guang-Hong looks almost guiltily up at Leo. His eyes are expectant, making Guang-Hong feel even more sorry for turning him down.

“I’m sorry Leo, but my father is in the area for work. I’m meeting up with him now.”

“Oh.” Leo almost visibly deflates a bit, but he straightens up again so fast Guang-Hong isn’t sure it happened.

“I’m sorry,” he says again, his hands fidgeting.

“No, it’s alright. I wish I could have more time with my family as well. Go have fun with your dad,” he says, his smile back again. Guang-Hong nods, Leo’s sigh as he turns away not going amiss. He decides to make it up to him later.

* * *

He never meant for it to happen, but every day leading up to the skate makes him hate the Russian more. He tries his best not to, but whenever he is in his vicinity, he will get annoyed looks. Guang-Hong knows he just broke up with his girlfriend, but he doesn’t see why the Russian must take it out on him.

That might be a slight exaggeration. He hasn’t really done anything to him yet. Just glaring as he and Leo bond over dumb jokes and outdated memes together. Leo doesn’t seem to notice at all. He is his usual smiling self, and whenever Guang-Hong feels intimidated, he will find something new to make him smile. It’s a warm kind of friendship, and it is different from the ones he has had before. He has never been so at ease, even though he knows Leo is technically a rival. And a good one at that.

Guang-Hong tries not to feel to bad about himself when he watches Leo skate, knowing he is a good skater himself. Instead, he resolves to find inspiration from him. He still doesn’t feel like he knows what he skates for, but slowly, something is forming in his mind.

He wants to be a hero, and not the shy boy he usually is. He wants to be like the leads in the movies, and blow the audience away as he saves the day. He wants people to feel as safe as he does when Leo makes him laugh. Phichit offhandedly comments that maybe they’re the real power couple on the ice, something that makes Guang-Hong sputter, asking if he has not seen how Yuuri and Viktor act around each other.

Still, he can’t deny that the two of them have grown close lately. In the end, that’s when everything falls into place, and he knows. He knows what he will skate for this year.

* * *

Like everything else, the good things have to come to an end. It was nice to stand on the podium, even if he only got bronze. The cheers of the crowd and the overwhelming feeling of adrenaline after winning is something Guang-Hong won’t forget. Even when he has to face his results in the China cup.

He stands with Leo as they watch Phichit take receive his medal together with Yuuri and Christophe. Guang-Hong can’t say he isn’t happy for his friend, but he really wishes it was him who stood there. His routine was one he had really enjoyed after all. He glances over at Leo who is smiling almost solemnly as he watches the three winners of the cup. Guang-Hong almost feels a bit embarrassed for having based his performance on a guy he only met recently, but he isn’t sure if he has anyone else he’d take a bullet for. Of course, there is his family and his coach, but his friendship with Leo is something different. It is simple and not strained in any way. There isn’t any suffocating expectations that comes with it.

“That’s gonna be me next year,” Guang-Hong mutters as the audience cheers for the trio. Leo laughs softly. It makes Guang-Hong feel a little bit better for some reason.

“Looks like we will both have to up our game. I really didn’t see this coming. Yuuri really made a comeback, didn’t he?” Leo says, his eyes contemplative. He turns to Guang-Hong, face determined. “I guess we'll just have to do good at our nationals for now. Let’s both win our events and meet again at the 4CC.” 

Guang-Hong nods, knocking his fist against Leo’s. If winning his nationals is what it takes to compete against his friends again, he will do it.

* * *

The atmosphere in the restaurant is upbeat as Guang-Hong, Leo and Phichit enter. Several of the other skaters are already there; a few of them lost to the alcohol before Guang-Hong even came in. He takes a deep whiff of the delicious aroma hanging in the air, suddenly aware of just how hungry he is.

Guang-Hong makes sure to have Phichit in between himself and Viktor, not wanting a repeat of the last time he saw him drunk. He still hasn’t been able to forget the last time. He will not let anything ruin tonight though. It is the last night he has with Leo, Phichit and all the others.

Being one of the youngest skaters there means he is one of the few who is still not allowed to drink, which is okay with him. It doesn’t take long before the majority of the older people in their group is more or less wasted. People start to retire after that, having planes to catch. Guang-Hong is the only one not leaving. He feels a bit sad seeing everyone go, but then again, he swore to do better in his nationals.

In the end, he ends up with supporting a slightly tipsy Leo on the way back to his hotel. Although he didn’t drink quite as much as the others, he still has problems walking straight, and his coach went home earlier. Guang-Hong doesn’t really mind all that much. However, the taller boy is starting to progressively get heavier as he leans onto Guang-Hong’s shoulder.

They stop at a corner, letting Guang-Hong catch his breath. He can see it in the air, a small smoky cloud leaving his lips. Leo leans against the wall, smiling in an exhausted fashion. Unlike Guang-Hong, he doesn’t seem to be affected by the cold. His eyes are closed, and his hair is falling out of the messy bun at the back of his head. He is kind of pretty. Almost all skaters seem to be, Guang-Hong quickly adds in his head. He leans against the wall next to Leo. They are only a few blocks away from the hotel.

He doesn’t know how long they stand there before Guang-Hong notices someone nudge his shoulder. Leo seems a bit more awake now, and nods towards the road leading onto the street the hotel is on.

“We should go before my coach starts to worry. It’s past nine already.”

“I don’t want to yet,” Guang-Hong mumbles. He isn’t ready to say goodbye just yet. They have barely had the time to know each other.

“A few minutes ago you really wanted to get out of the cold. Are you alright?” Leo asks, his eyes slightly worried. He reaches out to touch his palm to Guang-Hong’s head, but he shakes it off. He isn’t sure how to say it. It is probably a little bit ridiculous, and they barely know each other. For all he knows Leo might not have intended for them to meet again. He is kind to everyone, so of course he’d be nice to Guang-Hong too. In the end, he decides to just be honest.

“I’m not ready to say goodbye to everyone yet. I barely spent any time with Phichit, and I barely got to know you, and now you’re leaving.” He hates how broken his English sounds. He wish Leo understood Chinese, it would be so much easier.

“Hey, you don’t have to just yet.” Leo gently pats Guang-Hong’s head. Guang-Hong tries to keep his tears away, but he’s getting strangely emotional about it, and he is too tired to try to contain it. Leo fortunately doesn’t seem to be bothered about it, but hugs him, and leads him to the hotel. It isn’t as cold anymore. That doesn’t mean that Guang-Hong isn’t happy to step into the warmth of the hotel.

Leo’s coach doesn’t ask any questions as Guang-Hong follows the older boy into their room, probably used to the two of them hanging out.

“Phichit isn’t with you?” she asks. She has a newspaper on her lap and is not listening to the commercial currently blaring out through the tv.

“He went somewhere with his coach. I think they were going to see someone, but I’m not sure,” Leo replies. She nods and turns back to her paper.

“And you, Guang-Hong. Do you want anything to eat?” She doesn’t look up at him as she asks. Guang-Hong shakes his head, but realises she isn’t paying attention. He looks over to the leftovers she has in front of her, not feeling particularly keen on eating the cheap fast food she must have found at some chain store.

“No thanks,” he mumbles. Leo flops onto his bed. He closes his eyes, sighing contently. Guang-Hong awkwardly shuffles over to the bed, not sure if he should leave so his friend can catch some sleep. He sits down on the edge of Leo’s bed.

“I can’t wait to get some rest to be honest,” Leo says. He sits up. His bun has unravelled completely, leaving his brown locks to fall into his face. He blows his bangs away from his face, but they stubbornly fall into place again.

“It is a bit sad though. I really wanted to get to make a solid senior debut,” Guang-Hong says. He wonder how much he will have to give in order to advance in the nationals. Probably more than he has done up until now.

“I think it was pretty good. You got a bronze despite being the youngest at skate America. And trust me, the audience loved your programme. I did at least.” Guang-Hong smiles down at his lap. 

“Thanks,” he mumbles. Guang-Hong glances at the clock, realising he’s been gone for longer than he thought. He quickly stands up, gathering up his coat.

“It’s late, my coach is probably waiting for me.” Leo nods. He is obviously tired.

“I guess we will see each other at the world cup then.” Guang-Hong smiles, feeling determined.

“I hope so, I’ll do my best!” Leo rises and gathers him up into a hug. It is warm and nice, making Guang-Hong want to go to sleep where he stands. He hugs back, sighing. Leo presses a small slip of paper into his hand. Confused, Guang-Hong folds it out, reading the elegant albeit slightly messy script. 

“It’s a list of my usernames for different social media platforms. I guess it is more useful than just my instagram. That way we can keep in touch.”

Guang-Hong nods happily, shoving the slip of paper into his coat.

“Good luck! See you at the world championship!”

He runs out before he can comprehend what he just promised. Maybe he will actually have to quit all social media in order to achieve this. Apart from keeping in touch with Leo of course. He has a lot of work to do.

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Sorry for the wait, school has been killing me. Anyway, here's a new chapter, I hope you liked it.
> 
> I just feel like clarifying that I do not hate Georgi in any way, but I figured he didn't become the villain of Guang-Hong's imagination without having done anything to deserve it so here's my try at an explanation. I hope stuff works out for him, really.
> 
> The chapter title is of course a reference to Guang-hong's programmes.
> 
> If you have any questions or want to tell us how you like the fic so far, you can leave a comment or find us on tumblr. We're zerogravitychuuya and sheepouttetradecagon


	4. All These Things That I've Done

Leo was in a video call with Guang-Hong. The time for each of their country's nationals was fast approaching. Which meant that they were extremely busy, and hadn't had a lot of time to talk. They were catching up. It was nighttime in China, but it was morning in America. Leo was supposed to be getting ready to go practice, but he chose not to, focusing instead on his friend. 

“So how's everything in China?” Leo asked, looking at Guang-Hong through his laptop screen. His friend looked exhausted, and he felt bad for keeping him up, but Guang-Hong had not yet said he was tired. 

“Busy! Nationals are in a week, and I've been practicing like crazy to prepare for them. I'm excited, but also a bit nervous.” Guang-Hong admitted. Leo watched as the younger male yawned, trying to hide it behind his hand. 

“I bet. You look exhausted; do you need to go to sleep? I can let you go so you can do that.” Leo didn’t actually want to hang up, not yet, but he wasn’t going to jeopardize Guang-Hong’s sleeping schedule. He also knew that he’d be skating tomorrow, and skating without much energy from a lack of sleep can be dangerous.

“I’m okay! I don’t want to hang up yet. There’s a lot I want to tell you about still,” Guang-Hong said. Leo just chuckled.

“Alright, so tell me.” They launched into a long conversation. 

It felt like it lasted all day, but when Leo looked at the time next, it was 12:34. He was really late to the rink.

“Shit, Guang-Hong, I really gotta go! I’m so late, ahh, my coach is gonna kill me!”

“Oh, alright. I’ll talk to you tomorrow then?” Guang-Hong asked, another yawn punctuating the end of his sentence.

“Yep, tomorrow. Bye!”    
  
“Bye, Leo. Have fun!” Guang-Hong hung up after that, and Leo frantically began to search for his things. Once he had everything in his bag, he sprinted out of his building and towards the rink. Once he got inside, he was panting heavily, not used to running so fast. 

“I’m here, I’m here, please don’t scold me!” Leo said. His words came quick, and his coach couldn’t quite understand him. 

“Why are you late?” She asked instead, crossing her arms over her chest and giving Leo a pointed look. 

“I was on the phone with Guang-Hong and lost track of the time. I’m sorry.” Leo couldn’t look her in the face, so he busied himself with putting on his skates instead. 

His coach just sighed and told him the schedule for today. This was a public rink, so he had to be wary of others as they didn’t have the rink to themselves today. That also meant the focus would be on step sequences rather than jumps.

“But I have to work on jumps! I don’t practice them enough,” Leo protested. His coach narrowed her eyes at him. He backed off, figuring she was not in the mood for disobedience considering he was extremely late to practice.    
  
He stood from the bench he was sitting on and made his way to the rink. Before he entered, he told his coach once more that he was sorry he was late. She rolled her eyes at him, but smiled and told him to get to practice. Leo was relieved that she was no longer upset with him.

The first half of practice went fairly well. Leo’s step sequence was coming along nicely, and he really liked how it flowed with the song he was skating to. He nailed all the jumps he had been permitted to do. He was feeling quite well about today’s practice session. 

He took a break after landing a triple salchow and made his way to the edge of the rink, where his coach stood with a smile on her face. 

“You’re doing well. Keep it up, maybe we can go get a bite to eat afterwards. Do you need a drink?” She asked him. He nodded, and followed her off the ice to the locker rooms where their things were. He sat on the bench while his coach got him a bottle of water. 

“Hey, can I try to do a quadruple salchow?” He asked. He felt like he could pull it off. He’d just done a triple, after all. He wanted to at least attempt a quad; so many other skaters were, but he wasn’t. He felt like he was lagging behind. 

“Leo… you really don’t need a quad to get a high score on your program. You know that,” She sounded weary about letting him do a quad, especially when there were other skaters at the rink. 

“Please? I just want to try. I can do it, I know I can.” Leo smiled at his coach, wanting to reassure her that he really could pull it off.

She sighed. “I guess, but only one.” Leo cheered, and stood to hug her. 

“Thanks!”    
  
“Yeah, yeah. Are you ready to go back to practice now?” She asked him.

  
“Yep!”   
  
He went back onto the rink. He tried his quad and landed it without a hitch. He heard his coach cheer, and felt pride swell within him. _ I knew I could do it! _

Nationals were in a few days, and to celebrate, his coach took him to get Japanese food for dinner after practice. It wasn’t often that he got to eat Japanese food, but he did enjoy it a lot. 

“Thanks so much!” He said to his coach as they sat as the table after ordering.    
  
“My pleasure. Be sure to do great in the Nationals, ‘kay? That’s the only thing I ask for in return.”    
  
“You betcha,” Leo said, assured that he would do well. His practice sessions had been going great, after all.

Soon enough, the food they’d ordered arrived, and Leo practically inhaled his. His coach told him to slow down, unless he wanted to choke. He waved her off, too preoccupied with the food in front of him to hear her laugh and begin to eat as well.

\---

Finally, it was the day of the nationals. He got a message from Guang-Hong early this morning. He had wished Leo good luck at his nationals and told him to try hard, because he’d be trying hard too. He was determined now to succeed. 

He and his coach were waiting for the skaters to be allowed on the ice for the six-minute warm up before the competition started. When they heard the announcement, he waved to her and stepped out onto the ice. 

The warm up went well, and he was pumped up to participate in the nationals. He was up first, which was a bit nerve-wracking, but he paid no mind to that and focused on the feeling of skating. It was a great feeling, if he did said so himself.

The warm up ended, and all the skaters exited the ice.    
  
“Hey, Leo, good luck out there! You’ll do great,” his coach told him, giving him a hug. He smiled, hugged her back, and thanked her. 

“First skater today is Leo de la Iglesia. The piece he’ll be skating to is Stay Alive.” Leo heard the announcers come on and skated to the middle of the rink, ready to begin his performance.

The first half of his performance went well, and the audience was really pumped up. The second half was fast approaching.    
  
He hadn’t discussed this with his coach, but he decided he was going to put a quad in his program, in the second half. He knew it was risky, but he was riding on the high of the audience’s enthusiasm for his performance, so did not think about what could go wrong. 

He decided to change what should have been a triple toe loop into a quadruple toe loop. He’d never attempted that in practice before, but he was confident that he could do it. 

However, as soon as he jumped, he knew something was wrong. He was unsteady on the take off, and could only hope that he could fix it mid air. 

But that didn’t happen. When he came down, he landed on the wrong foot, the left foot. Not only that, he felt an intense pain shoot through his entire being, the source of it being his left ankle. An audible crack could be heard. He screamed in agony, the pain becoming unbearable with each passing moment. 

He couldn’t stay upright, and ended up hitting his head on the ice when he fell. He screamed again, the pain that was now in his head coinciding with the pain in his ankle made him feel like his entire body was on fire. He wailed, laying there on the ice.    
  
“Leo! Oh, god, Leo! Are you alright?” His coach called to him from the other side of the rink. The music was shut off, and the entire rink was quiet save for Leo’s pain-filled cries. 

Two people rushed towards him, carrying a stretcher. They lift him on to the stretcher, and he notices some blood on the ice where his head was. He felt like he was going to be ill.  _ That can’t be… _ He reached a hand up to his head and touched it, feeling a wet, sticky substance. His fingers came away, stained in red. _ How could this be happening? Why me? Why now? _ He passed out from the sight of the blood before they could even load him into the ambulance. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry
> 
> come scream at us at zerogravitychuuya and sheepouttetradecagon on tumblr


	5. Say something I'm giving up on you

Guang-Hong closed his laptop, leaning back with a sigh. It had been over an hour since he last logged on, and it really didn’t look like Leo was going to appear anytime soon. Maybe he had done really well at his event and had gone out with the others to celebrate, and in process forgotten to alert Guang-Hong about it? Yeah, that was probably it. Still, Guang-Hong couldn’t help but feel a bit down about it. He really did love their Skype meetings. 

He glanced over to the other side of the room. A pile of unfinished homework was sitting on his desk, hovering accusingly at the periphery of his vision. He knew he would have to get around to it soon. His parents had been adamant about him studying hard in addition to skating, the career of a skater painfully short. Even at such a young age, it wouldn’t take a lot to ruin everything. Of course, Guang-Hong tried not to think too hard about it, enjoying the sport as much as he can while he can, because it isn’t going to get any better if he worries about endings all the time. His parents, on the other hand, made sure to do the worrying for him. He had mixed feelings about it all.

The thing is, apart from skating and his distant dream of becoming a hollywood star, Guang-Hong didn’t really have many plans for the future. The school subjects were complicated and uninteresting, but it didn’t change the fact that his parents expected him to do well. 

He started to flick through the worn pages of a science textbook, trying to make sense of the words printed on the paper. Usually, Leo would be able to provide him with some help when it came to understanding the material. However, it looked like Guang-Hong would be on his own today.

He brought the book with him and slumped on his bed. The sun had gone down hours ago, only the plethora of lights outside his window making it possible to see anything. The city was almost more alive at nighttime when the electric lights lit up the complicated labyrinth of streets stretching out beneath his window. It would only be around 07:15 AM at Leo’s place now, the sun probably just above the horizon. 

Living in a different timezone than his friend had made Guang-Hong pretty good at calculating the time in Leo’s hometown. With a 15 hour difference, it was sometimes hard to find a good time to Skype with each other, often leading to Guang-Hong staying up late into the night just to talk with his friend.

That was another thing his parents didn’t really approve of. He knew they were right about him needing sleep, but there was no way he was going to stop talking with Leo. If he ended up being a little bit tired at school, it would be worth it.

However, that didn’t seem to be something he needed to worry about at the moment. The city sighed with its nightly activity, the many lights visible behind the pink curtains hanging at the sides of the windows.

Guang-Hong sprawled back on his bed, skimming through his homework. It took longer than it should have, his thoughts constantly drifting back to a certain brown-haired boy, but he managed to finish it before midnight, yawning as he put the book down.

The house was quiet as he made his way to the bathroom to brush his teeth, his parents already in bed. It was a normal routine for them, him staying up longer than they did. His father left early in the morning for work, and his mother barely had the time to wake him before she too had to go. Often, he was left to fend for himself, which was okay. If there is anything, he had his coach.

When he returned to his room, there was still no response from Leo. Maybe he just forgot? That seemed like a viable reason. Guang-Hong picked up his phone and typed out a short message.

_ To: Leo  January 4th, 01.37AM _

_ Hey, how did it go today? I’m still up for Skyping if you forgot :) _

The message sounded wrong in Guang-Hong’s head, and he hit the back arrow on the keyboard until disappeared. He didn’t want to seem pushy. Leo was already so patient with him, and if he didn’t feel like talking to Guang-Hong right now that was alright. Still, he couldn’t help it. Leo was so much easier to open up to compared to anyone else he knew.

It took him a while, but he managed to come up with a message before he reluctantly shut off his lamp and went to sleep.

_ To: Leo  January 4th 17th 02.13 AM _

_ I’m going to sleep now, but if you’re up for talking tomorrow night I am as well. _

* * *

_ To: Leo January 6th 21:45 PM _

_ Hey, are you alright? I guess you must be really busy. _

 

_ To:Leo January 6th 23:54 PM _

_ I’m sorry to bother you again. I know that you are busy, but if you see this can you please send me a message? It doesn’t have to be long, just let me know. _

 

_ To: Leo January 7th 17:21PM _

_ I know this is early, but I saw someone skate a really nice program today and I think you would have loved it. I have a video if you wanted to get some inspiration from it, so I’ll just leave it here before I forget. _

_ 1 file attached. _

 

_ To: Leo January 8th 22:03PM _

_ My coach said we will probably go to the US for the 4CC. Will you be there too? Maybe we can meet up? _

  
  


_ To: Leo January 9th 20:51PM _

_ If you don’t feel like talking anymore, please tell me. I’ll stop. _

 

_ To: Leo January 11th 21:31PM _

_ Please come back. I miss you.  _

* * *

Guang-Hong pulled on his skates, tying the laces slowly. He had to try a few times before he got it right, his hands sluggish from lack of sleep. His coach eyed him impatiently, her eyes telling him to hurry up. Yawning, Guang-Hong finally managed to finish tying his skates. 

It had been a week since he had last heard from Leo, something which was mildly concerning. Of course, he knew the other boy was busy with his own career, but Guang-Hong had at least expected him to reply to his messages. If not all of them at least one, there were more than enough to chose from. 

It became evident just how unfocused he was when he hit the ice with a twack, his cheek burning from the impact. He wheezed as the breath was knocked out of him, trying to regain calm. However, the fall just seemed to augment the conflicted feelings he had been struggling with for the past week, and in the end he couldn’t keep his tears in check.

His coach was by his side, guiding him off the ice before he knew it. She sat him down on a bench, finding a pack of ice for his cheek. It’s a bit ironic how the ice was the reason he was now pressing an icepack to his face. He shivered from the cold, but kept it there anyways. A hand landed on his shoulder as his coach sat down next to him, her serious eyes boring into him.

“Is there something on your mind Guang-Hong? You’ve been unfocused all day.”

Guang-Hong averted his eyes, suddenly finding his toepicks really interesting. He knew it was unfair to her to be out of sorts when she put so much time and energy into coaching him. Maybe he shouldn’t had come today at all. 

“Hey, you know you can tell me if there is anything bothering you,” she mumbled, pushing his hair out of his eyes. Guang-Hong shrugged, not really up for talking about it. His parents had been pushing him more than ever to enter an university next year after his GP didn’t go that well this year. The mood in the house had been sour for the past few days after a couple of fights too many, making Guang-Hong just want to lock himself up somewhere and die. Of course, Leo not replying to his messages on top of everything didn’t help.

His coach let him be quiet, silently rubbing soothing circles on his lower back. She might be strict, but she was a pillar of support for the Chinese boy that he was indescribably grateful for. They sat there for a few minutes, saying nothing. It was enough. Sometimes, the best kind of comfort was to just know someone was there. 

Guang-Hong didn’t go back onto the ice that day, but headed home instead. He half-heartedly scrolled through his Instagram feed on his phone as he walked. Pictures of Phichit were flooding his dash, the older skater relentlessly sharing whenever something interesting happened. There were a few pictures from other skaters taking up his dash as well, but none of which Guang-Hong felt very interested in at the moment. The feed was strangely absent of anything from Leo. Maybe he had taken a break from social media altogether? Still, he would have told Guang-Hong wouldn’t he? The young boy quickly shoved away the nasty voice in the back of his mind suggesting that something might have happened to his friend. It had been bothering him all week, but he knew how quickly his imagination tended to run loose. Leo was fine.

* * *

 

It was only when he walked through his front door that he noticed that he had three missed calls from Phichit. It wasn’t unusual for them to call each other every now and then, the two of them being good friends after all. However, they rarely talked about anything that was important enough to warrant three missed calls. Guang-Hong wrinkled his brow in confusion, slumping down on his unmade bed.

Phichit didn’t pick up when he tried the the first time, however, the call connected on the second ring on his second try, an out of breath voice meeting him.

“Hello?”

“Phichit, hi,” Guang-Hong said, worried that he might have disturbed the other. “If it’s not a good time I can call you back.”

“No, it’s fine. I just finished training. I just needed to know if you heard the news. The other’s had the impression that you didn’t know.”

What news? Guang-Hong knew he tended to be a bit oblivious from time to time, and not all news reached China. He might easily have missed out on something. Still, what gossip could be important enough fro Phichit to call three times?

“I’m not sure what you’re talking about.”

“Seriously, you have no idea?”

“Phichit, just tell me,” Guang-Hong demanded, his gut twisting in a bad way. He could feel his hands growing clammy around his phone.

“It’s about Leo. He had an accident during the nationals.” 

At first, Guang-Hong wasn’t sure if it was just his imagination making him hear things. He tried to process the words, checking if there was any way he could have misheard Phichit. The bad feeling that had been plaguing him for the past week suddenly felt much more real.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t quite get that,” he nearly whispered, not trusting his voice.

“He had a bad landing after a jump. From what I’ve heard he hit his head really bad, but what’s worse is he might have damaged a tendon, and he also broke something. It has been all over the news in the skating world, I’m surprised you didn’t see it. One of your rink mates told me you hadn’t been yourself lately, so I thought I’d check if you were okay, but they had a feeling you might not have been informed, seems they were right.”

“I- I never even checked. I waited for him to tell me his results in the Nationals himself, I never checked to see if he was okay,” Guang-Hong stuttered. A small part of him had been avoiding the news knowing it could have been something like this. Of course, he had chalked it up to paranoia and Leo being busy. It all seemed like a sick joke now.

“It's okay, or I guess it's not but I'm sure he won't be mad. And it's not like it would've been in the big news, sports accidents happens all the time right?”

The words didn’t make any sense anymore. Phichit was saying something on the other end, his voice progressively growing louder and more worried. Guang-Hong’s sight started to blur, the happy colours of his room blending into a obscured mush in front of him as tears started to fall. He shook his head in an attempt to clear it, biting his lip as if it would do something. As if it would wake him from this nightmare. He barely registered Phichit’s worried voice saying he’d hang up to give Guang-Hong some peace and quiet, but begged him to call if he needed to talk to anyone. As the line went dead, Guang-Hong did as well.

He curled into a ball on top of his blankets, lying still, the nearly imperceptible shaking the only sign that he was alive. He knew it was stupid for him to cry like this, it wasn’t going to help Leo, and he was not the one being hurt, but the mere thought of his friend being badly injured or even dying was enough to shock him into a panicked state of mind.

He didn’t know how long he just laid there before his parents find him there, shaking him awake. He hadn’t even noticed himself falling asleep. His mother fretted over his sore red eyes, finding a washing cloth to clean his face. She tried to question him about it, but for some reason, Guang-Hong found that he is unable to speak. He just sat in one of the kitchen chairs, numbly staring into the wall. It didn’t take long before his mother started to bring up homework and school again, despite his obviously dejected mood.

The career of a skater painfully short after all. Even at such a young age, it wouldn’t take a lot to ruin everything. Guang-Hong never really took it seriously, cause he never thought it’d be him, and it never was. Never before has he wished so fervently that it was him instead. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait! School has been hell lately, but I've finally gotten around to writing again.   
> Anyways, I hoped you liked the new chapter. I guess I should say I'm sorry for the angst. If you guys want to scream at us about it leave a comment or come find us on tumblr.
> 
> We're SheepOutTetradecagon and zerogravityChuuya


	6. Deadbeat Holiday

Leo was flipping through the pages of a magazine his mother had brought in for him. There was nothing for him to do at the hospital, and he wanted to go home. The doctors wouldn’t let him, though. 

“He hit his head pretty hard, we want to keep him here for at least a week to monitor him. Just in case,” his primary doctor had said. He groaned when he heard this news and crossed his arms, angrily refusing to look at anyone. He was a busy person. Being cooped up in a hospital room would put him way behind schedule.

The magazine he was looking at was about celebrities. Who was with who now, what so-and-so had just done, the like. He rolled his eyes and tossed it aside. He never did like all the celebrity drama, but there was not exactly anything else to read. Most of the magazines available at stores were about celebrities or dieting, and he was interested in neither.

He sighed and looked out the window. He saw different colored buildings, green trees, and a magnificent blue sky. He wished he was outside instead of in the drab white hospital room.  _ Would it kill them to put some color in these rooms? _ Leo thought.  _ This is depressing. _

Before his accident, he had been under the impression that hospitals were quiet, depressing places full of death. His viewpoint had since changed, even from just a few days in the facility. The staff was constantly bustling about, people could be heard at every hour of the day, and machines whirred and beeped nonstop. Granted, it was still depressing (many of the people screamed and cried from loss), but in no ways was it quiet and dead.

He had absentmindedly began playing with loose strings on the sheets when his door slammed open out of the blue. In came Guang-Hong, along with Guang-Hong’s coach and Leo’s own parents. 

“Guang! I didn’t expect to see you. What’s up?” Leo asked in his usual friendly voice. Guang-Hong did not respond well. At all. The young skater broke down in tears as he rushed to his friend’s bedside. 

“You idiot, you dumb stupid idiot! How did you wind up in here? Why? I thought you were seriously hurt! Damn it, Leo, you need to be more careful from now on!” Guang-Hong expressed his thoughts loudly. Leo winced.

“Ah, Guang, not so loud, please. I’m sorry. I wasn’t paying attention, I guess. I didn’t mean for this to happen.”    
  
“Who would?” Guang-Hong mumbled under his breath. Leo smiled sadly at him.

“Well, you won’t have to worry about me getting in anymore accidents, at least.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Guang-Hong looked Leo in the eye. 

“I’m quitting competitive skating.”   
  
“Leo! You can’t-”   
  
“Listen to me a sec. I messed up my ankle pretty bad, doc said I may not be able to skate again and if I somehow could, there’d be no way that I could figure skate. It’s for the best that way, I think. No more accidents. And I'll have more time to focus on studies and also more time to talk to you. Won’t that be nice?” A few awkward seconds passed by with no one saying a word. He cleared his throat.   
  
“You won’t be skating with me. Competing with me, against me. You won’t be there. It’s meaningless without you there,” Guang-Hong said, his voice very quiet, yet holding immense emotions.

“I’ll come support you at the events, though. I won’t be gone,” Leo tried to assure his friend, but it had no effect.

“That isn’t the point, Leo. You were the one that made this fun. You made it enjoyable and tolerable. You made it mean something. I don’t know if I can do it without you there…”

Leo’s expression hardened. “Guang, listen to me, yeah? You can’t give up a promising career like you have ahead of you because of me. I won’t allow it. I’m making this decision because I don’t have another option right now. But you can’t let my decision affect your career. I promise I’ll come watch you perform and cheer you on with all I’ve got, but you’ve gotta promise me that you won’t do something that’ll mess with your future because of me, yeah?”   
  
Guang-Hong refused to look Leo in the face. Leo knew that this meant Guang-Hong knew Leo was right, but he did not want to admit that. 

“Fine. You’re right, I guess. But don’t expect it to be easy. ‘Cause it won’t be.”   
  
“I know it won’t.”  
  
“Next season, my theme is going to be ‘Fight Me, Leo de la Iglesia.’” 

The two of them laughed at Guang-Hong’s joke. Then all of a sudden, Leo grabbed him in a hug as best as he could. He kept him close and held him tight, not wanting to let go.

“I’m sorry. I missed you. Please don’t go,” Leo whispered. 

“I won’t,” Guang-Hong whispered back. “I’ll stay right here with you.”

The two skaters had been unaware of the conversation happening in the background until Leo picked up a part of it.

“When is he going to be released, Mrs. Iglesia?” Guang-Hong’s coach asked. 

“Yeah, mom, when will I be released? This hospital is such a drag,” Leo complained, exaggerating his discomfort.

“A few days, sweetie. Just a little while longer. We’re supposed to monitor him at home, too,” Leo’s mother said. 

Leo whined. The few days he had already spent here felt like an eternity, how would he survive more? He didn’t think he could. 

“Monitor him?” Guang-Hong piped up.

“Yep, make sure he’s doing alright and such. If he starts acting out of the ordinary, we’re supposed to bring him to the ER immediately,” Leo’s father explained.

“Oh, Leo? That means limited screen time for you.”   
  
“Wha-?”   
  
“Doctor’s orders!”   
  
“Ugh, this totally blows! How will I be able to talk to Guang-Hong?” Leo pouted for a second, but then his face brightened. “Mom, could Guang stay here with us for a while?” He looked at Guang-Hong, who looked taken aback by the suggestion. “I mean, only if you want to.”   
  
“I, uh-”   
  
“If it’s alright with his parents and coach, then I’m fine with it.” His mother smiled.

“Wait a minute,” Guang-Hong’s coach said. “Is there a specific reason Guang-Hong has to stay?” His coach seemed less than pleased.

“Well, he doesn’t have to, and it’s up to you, him, and his parents if he does. But the doctors have been having Leo see a psychologist as well, to monitor him. The psychologist said that Leo not being able to do what he loves anymore would most likely have a serious negative effect on him. That it’d be good if he had someone he’s close to around him to help him cope,” Leo’s father explained. 

“That doesn’t explain why it has to be Guang-Hong specifically. Doesn’t he have other friends?” The coach was not prepared for the solemn mood to settle around the occupants of the room.

“Um, no, not really… I’ve always had trouble making friends. Guang-Hong and Phichit are the main people I talk to nowadays,” Leo admitted, glancing at Guang-Hong and his coach before looking down at his lap.

“Oh,” Guang-Hong’s coach whispered. 

Awkward silence hung around them, making the ambiance tense. 

“My husband and I would try our best to help him cope, but we can’t be there for him in the same way someone like Guang-Hong could. Someone who shares his experiences in a sort,” Leo’s mom said.    
  
“There’s a rink nearby, so Guang could still go to practice,” Leo piped up, finally looking at his friend’s coach. She sighed.

“I don’t have a problem staying, but you need to talk to your parents, young man.” The coach looked at Guang-Hong. He nodded.

“I’ll do that right away,” he said, scurrying out of the room to phone his parents.   
  
Leo felt strangely happy for the first time since his incident. It would be nice to stay with his friend and talk to him face to face. They couldn’t do that often, since they lived the whole way across the world from each other. Leo was looking forward to spending time with Guang-Hong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title is just because I was listening to the song while posting this chapter. 
> 
> I am sorry for the lateness of this. I kept forgetting about it and pushing it off. It's been like a month. I feel terrible. But here is the new chapter of this story!
> 
> I know nothing about injuries of this sort, so this is all very off most likely, please don't hold it against me. For the sake of the fic and not accuracy, it will be left as is. Sorry once again.
> 
> If you're enjoying the story so far, be sure to leave a comment or catch us @ zerogravitychuuya and sheepouttetradecagon on tumblr to let us know how we're doing!


	7. Don't say you've lost the love inside your heart

* * *

The hotel bed was hard and uncomfortable to sleep in, but that was not the reason for Guang-Hong’s restlessness. He glanced over to the other bed where his coach was sleeping peacefully. Her small body was almost invisible amongst the thick sheets in the dim light.

Although the atmosphere was calm and peaceful, Guang-Hong felt his stomach twist uncomfortably. I've always had trouble making friends. Something about the words haunted him; felt wrong, and out of place. He couldn't comprehend how a kindhearted boy like Leo would have a hard time making friends. Himself, a shy and nervous personality? Yes. But not  
someone as confident and collected as Leo.

His fingers were hovering above a message on his phone. He had needed several tries to type it out, and he still felt anxious about it.

Hi mom. The US is very interesting, we should go together sometime. Say hi to dad from me. Also, there's something I need to ask you. Please call when you get home from work.

He turned the phone over in his hands. The numbers on his lock screen showed 22:54. Only a little longer before his parents would return from work.

In the heat of the moment earlier that day he had almost ended up calling them in the middle of the night. That would probably not have helped his situation. It had already been hard enough to get them to let him leave in the first place; the polite request from his coach after she sensed his concentration straying being the only thing weighing the scales in his favour.

He had yet to figure out what to tell them. He sighed, laying back down again, mindlessly swiping through the apps on his phone. He was only seconds from falling asleep when his phone suddenly buzzed in his hand. Hi eyes flew open, fingers frantically swiping at the screen to answer the call. He took a deep breath before raising the device to his ear.

“Hello?”

“Guang-Hong? Can you hear me?” Guang-Hong shifted his position, lying down on his back again.

“I can hear you mom.” There was a sigh on the other side of the line.

“Is everything alright over there? Has something happened?”

Guang-Hong paused. He could feel his gut twist with anticipation as he mulled over what to say next. He knew he didn’t really have any good arguments for as to why he should be allowed to stay. At least not any that would be good in his parent’s eyes.

“I’m fine. Please don’t worry mom, both me and my coach is enjoying it here.”  
“That is good to hear. We both miss you very much. Your plane is scheduled for next wednesday is it not?”

“Yeah..”

“Wonderful. We should go out and eat together when you come back.” Guang-Hong clenched his eyes shut. This was going to be harder than he thought.

“I can't.”

The other end of the line went silent. Guang-Hong could hear how his mother’s breath slowed down. It was that even rhythm she would force herself to keep in order to maintain her calm.

“Excuse me?”

“I can't. Things happened.”

“Surely you have not gotten yourself into trouble háizi?”

“Leo needs me mom. He hasn’t got anyone else. I can’t just leave him like this.”

“Did your coach put you up to this?”

“What? No, of course not! She just told me I needed to ask you. And I am. Please let me stay until the Chinese nationals. The people here are really talented, and not only would it help Leo, I might be able to improve as a skater as well, I-”

“I knew this wasn’t a good idea. Don’t you realize you’re already far behind in school? We just want what is best for you. You can’t possibly think that your short sighted idea will yield anything? It is evident that you haven’t thought this through. You’re coming home immediately. I’ll have your father reschedule your flight for tomorrow.”

Tears welled up in Guang-Hong’s eyes. On the other side of the room his coach sat up in her bed, squinting at Guang-Hong.

“I’m staying. I’m sorry mom, but you can’t keep bossing over me forever. I’m 18, this should be my decision. I can get someone to tutor me while I’m here, and Leo can help me catch up with school work as well, ‘cause he’s smart! He’s kind and smart and he doesn’t deserve any of the stuff that is happening to him right now and I am not leaving him!”

The phone was pried out of Guang-Hong’s hands before he could add any more insults. His coach eyed him, her eyes warning him to stay quiet while she handled it. Her voice was low and even as she conversed with his mom. Guang-Hong hugged his plushie to his chest, biting angrily into the top of his head in order to get out some frustration. He forced himself to breathe slowly, letting the anger wash away. On the other side of the room, his coach seemed to be coming to an agreement with his mother. She nodded and went to write down something on a slip of paper before politely telling his mother goodbye.

When she hung up, Guang-Hong was nearly shaking with anticipation. His coach handed him the slip, and sat down on the bed next to him. It was several email adresses, scribbled down in his coach’s elegant script.

“I hope you’re grateful for this, ‘cause it was a hell to make her agree without firing me on the spot. Those are the emails of your teachers. I want you to write to them and explain your situation and have them send over your curriculum for this semester. I’ll make some arrangements with the local coaches to rent the rink and to find you a tutor. Also, I hope you realize that your courses will be taught in English, so I expect you to work extra hard to keep up even if language is going to make this much harder, understand?”

Guang-Hong nodded. He let his eyes scan the words on the paper. He hoped his teachers wouldn’t be too angry with him. He let his eyes drift to his coach. Her eyes were soft with an underlying hardness to them.

“Thanks,” he mumbled. “I really appreciate it.”

“You wouldn’t be able to win anything with this eating on you. This is purely out of my belief in your chance at gold at the world’s, you got it?”

“Yeah, thanks anyways.”

“Good, now go to sleep. You’ll have a lot to fix tomorrow.”

“Goodnight.”

“Good night Guang-Hong.”

* * *

“No, you’re spelling it wrong, it should be an e here, not a.”

“Oh, thank you.”

The eraser felt heavy in Guang-Hong’s hand as it, for the umptenth time, had to remove his ugly handwriting from the paper. His tutor, a girl named Lena just smiled patiently, leaning back in her chair.

“You’ll get it eventually, actually I think you’re doing great!”

“I need to get it perfect if I don’t want my parents to be mad though.”

“Chill little guy. What’s important is that you understand, even if you’re spelling is wrong. This is biology, not English grammar.”

Lena had pulled out her notebook and started to doodle. Guang-Hong forced his attention back to the task ahead of him. Genetics had never been his strong suit, and the terms involved were often hard to understand, even with Lena trying to explain as best as she could. Even so, he was fairly confident he had gotten it right this time around.

Before he had the chance to hand his book over to Lena for inspection, the door opened, and Leo peeked in. He was on crutches, but seemed to be doing fine. Guang-Hong lit up as he entered, running over to give his friend a hug. Leo laughed at him, embracing him with one arm. On the other side of the room, Lena whistled, her hazel eyes still trained on her notebook.

Guang-Hong felt his cheeks heat up and stepped away from Leo, letting him come into the room.

“Did I interrupt you? I can wait until you’re done.”

“We were just looking at some excercises. I think we can call it a day though. I’ve been itching to get going anyways. See you around Leo.” Lena rose from her chair and slipped past Leo before disappearing down the hallway.

“I thought you didn’t have any friends?” Guang-Hong muttered, letting the other boy sit down in a chair. He smiled sheepishly, his hand flying up to put some stray hairs behind his ear.

“I wouldn’t call us friends, and apart from you and Phichit I’m not really close to anyone around my age. Lena’s almost 26. She’s just another rinkmate, and I wouldn’t want to get too close. Her boyfriend is scary.”

“She has a boyfriend?”

“She’s way too old for you Guang-Hong.”

“What? I’m not into her oh my god, Leo!” Guang-Hong lightly hit Leo in the shoulder, his blush flaring up again. Damn his pale complexion! Leo laughed again, his face back to the happy expression Guang-Hong usually associated with the other boy. Guang-Hong smiled, glad that Leo seemed to be recovering.

“Are you here to skate? I’m meeting up with my coach in half an hour, but the rink is probably free if you want to.”  
Leo’s face immediately fell. He averted his eyes, shoulders tense as he appeared to be mulling over a response. Guang-Hong internally scolded himself for having brought it up. Of course Leo wasn’t going to skate, he was still using crutches. Even if he wanted to, he wouldn’t be able to.

“I already told you, I’m not returning to the ice.”

“But when you get better? Your doctor said you would be able to, didn’t he?”

“No Guang-Hong. I’m not returning to skating. It is better this way. Even if I could start training again I probably wouldn’t be able to compete on the same level as before. And if something were to happen again I might not be as lucky.”

“You’re scared,” Guang-Hong accused. He knew he was being unreasonable, bringing up such as sore subject when the reason he was there was to help Leo. It was selfish, but he so desperately wanted to skate with his friend again, just like before.

“I’m not scared. I’m being realistic. My career as a skater is over. Which is okay, I can focus on creating music now.”

“But won’t you miss it? What am I supposed to do when you’re not there?”

Leo smiled wistfully. “You’re going to win the nationals, and then the world championship. Just like you said you would, right?”

“Please Leo, you’re amazing. You can’t just give up because of this. At least try. If it doesn’t work out, quit, but not yet.”

“I’d rather not get my hopes up. You on the other hand. I would be content with watching you win. Speaking of which, you should probably go warm up. I’ll wait for you until you’re done, then we can grab something to eat afterwards? I know a great place for Italian food, their food is heavenly. I’m sure you’ll like it.”

“Sounds good. I’ll find you after practice.”

Leo smiled, any traces of their conversation gone. Guang-Hong sighed. If Leo wanted him to win, he would do his best. Still, he was not ready to give up on his friend. Somehow, be it professionally or just for fun, Guang-Hong was going to make Leo love the ice again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Háizi means child
> 
> Sorry for the late update, it's been stressful with family and applying to schools next years but things seems to be calming fo n on that front (now school will be the only thing killing me, rip) 
> 
> Chapter title from "Lovers never say goodbye" by weeping willows 
> 
> If you want to say hi we're sheepouttetradecagon and zerogravitychuuya on tumblr :)


End file.
